OK, I'm just kidding. My life is not bad at all. I just thought that might be an attention-getting title for this post.
My life is great! I have three beautiful, healthy children and a loving husband who works hard to take care of us. I enjoy many fulfilling activities during the week (not the least of which is spending time with my family).
But . . . well . . . even though I have a great life, sometimes it gets stressful.
Take potty training, for example. Noodle was going along like gangbusters for awhile, but then she just starting peeing her pants every ten minutes. I was taking her every thirty minutes, and that was working like a charm. But then she started to balk, not wanting to go at the appointed time, then peeing in her pants before I could get to her again. She thinks that all things that come out into her pants are poop, so she comes up and says, "I poop," and I think, "Oh, great," but really it's just pee. Which isn't exactly nice, but better than cleaning out poop-filled training pants.
Which is exactly what I did this morning.
Normally, Noodle will wear pull-ups in the morning. She will pee in the potty, but not poop, so if she poops in her pull-up, it's no big deal. But we are out of pull-ups, so it was training pants or nothing, and I keep hoping against hope that she'll magically poop in the potty. Well, she didn't. After a very successful peeing morning, I smelled the dreaded smell. And this was a bad one. And Banana has a fever today and he was crying, so I'm changing Noodle, trying not to get poop literally everywhere as I'm taking off her training pants, I was thinking some things:
"I have a college degree, and I'm doing this?"
"My house is a wreck - how am I ever going to get everything done today?"
And then, as I'm washing out the training pants in the bathtub and then cleaning out all the poop that didn't go down the drain:
"Did I make the right life choices?"
Yep, staring at a tub-full of poop will do that to you. You'll wonder why you didn't finish those last 30 hours for your master's degree. You'll wonder if you'll ever be worth anything more than just a poop-washer-outer. You'll wonder if what you are doing matters to anyone, anywhere.
And to top it off, I just got a retail job. I'll be starting in a couple of weeks. It won't last forever, and we really need to extra money. I'll be on nights and weekends, and I'm starting just in time for the holiday rush. I worked at the same store a couple of years ago, so they were happy to hire me right back on.
And working retail makes me feel very humble. If you want a lesson in humility, or if you have a problem with pride, working retail will knock all of that right out of you. Already I'm thinking, "what kind of a job is this? how humiliating . . . "
And I can look back at this entire post and see it oozing with counterfeits. You know why? Because all of those thoughts are attacks from the enemy, who wants to steal my joy. And any of Satan's lies are direct counterfeits of God's truths. Do you know what that means?
I really must be doing something special. I am worth much more than I can even fathom. I have made good life choices. And as for the job, it's a great job. You know why? So many reasons. I displayed good work ethic, so was happily rehired. There are many people who can't work. There are many places in the world where someone couldn't just walk in one day and get a job right off the bat. I'm able to help my family. I have the ability and desire to do so.
Thankfully, I am not unaware of Satan's schemes. When I feel the attacks of the enemy this hard, I just start to praise God, because I must be doing something really great, something I don't even know that I'm doing, that Satan wants to stop from happening. Christ through me is doing some amazing things, as long as I don't stand in the way. That's pretty exciting stuff! It may not feel like it, as I stare at a tubful of poop, but it really must be. And anyway, if God is for me, who or what circumstance can be against me? The fruits of my labor are only just budding, and I see them in the faces of my family. God help me just do right by them and to disbelieve the lies of the enemy.
"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a future and a hope." Jeremiah 29:11
8 comments:
I love how you can take those poop in the bathtub situations and put them in the bigger perspective of God's plan. OF COURSE you can do so much more than clean crap from the trap (so to speak). And you do. Those little munchkins are learning and loving and growing (along with pooping, of course) every day. And it's largely because of your efforts. You inspire me.
Preach it, Sister.
You know, since I am dad-from-hell, I had T clean out his own. Not all the time, only when he didn't try to make it to the bathroom or let me know he needed to go.
One time, I put him to his task and went to get a chnage for him when I heard a flush, which he was told not to do. I rushed back across the hall. T was crying (you remember what that was like) and demanding that I open the back of the toilet where the water is to get his Winnie-the-Pooh underwear out.
It was so sad. I almost felt something . . .? Since I am otherwise emotionally dead, I don't know whether it was sorrow? empathy? love? or some other useless emotion. :-)
Oh, and I will just sign this one Anon.
Oh dear Anon . . . I wouldn't dare let Noodle clean out her own! That would result in a bigger mess and Noodle needing a bath! Heavens no . . . but I do not think you are devoid of emotion.
Thanks for all your comments. The plain fact is: it is hard being a parent, and Satan wants to thwart good parenting at every turn, especially parenting that points children to God. It gets harder and harder the more exhuasted or depressed I am, but God's strength is never out of our grasp.
I'm going through a study with some sweet ladies at church: When Godly People Do Ungoldy Things, by Beth Moore. I have never done a Beth Moore study and was quite skeptical, because her stuff is so commercialized, but let me tell you, that woman is annointed of God. She is so humble and in the Word. I can't wait to blog about what I've been learning and about how many lightbulbs have been going off as a result of this study.
Stay strong, parents and those who are not parents but who love us and are praying for us (and I'm praying for you, too, anitamarita, and am SO GLAD your computer saved your paper!). Much love to all of you -
if it's any comfort, preston still peepees inside sometimes. girl, you are strong. and an amazing mom!
I too love how you turn a day of poop into a lesson about God's plan. You are awesome! Although I've only actually met Chicken Nugget, I love all of your kids, and I know they are in great hands!
Um - Tarimisu - I think you missed a name substitution for Noodle.
6th Para, close to the end.
Thanks, Harvey! Got it. I need to do better editing. Thanks for stopping by my blog!
Post a Comment